I’m batting zero for four today. Rarely do I leave the house these days as you all know but today I put on some blush and took a field trip to pick up some art at Janita and Freddie DeCourt’s office. While visiting I heard my phone vibrate inside my purse and ignored it on account of being able to talk to someone other than myself. When I got back to the car I had several missed calls with a voice message that said, “We have three units at your home on East Main Street responding to an alarm.” As Janita said, “The one time you leave the house your alarm goes off.” After that fiasco I went back out to continue my interrupted field trip to Dodson Street. I’m a frequent visitor to Dodson Street because Brother Bo told me about a year ago there’s something on Dodson Street he wanted me to see so I’ve been cruising Dodson Street and still haven’t cracked the case. So just a couple of days ago we were sitting on his back stoop and I asked, “When are you going to tell me about Dodson Street? I took another drive down there yesterday and still can’t figure it out.” He then said, “I’m a little disappointed because it’s not there anymore but I think it’ll be back.”

Then it must be seasonal I thought so I cruised again and looked at every rabbit and spring wreath and hard boiled egg decor till I thought the rabbits were multiplying but nothing caught my attention. Dodson Street residents are starting to stare at me with a crack in their screen doors. I then decided to go to Kim’s Phil-A-Sack-Chinese-Seafood-Chicken-Gas Station because I’ve been craving Chinese since March of 2020. I walked in and there was quite the line that intimidated me because I never pick up food-to-go except for a chili dog. They seemed to know the ordering rules and I didn’t and I have a desperate need to know how to do something before I do it, so I too stood around in the back by the milk in order to get in the appropriate socially-distanced line. After a while I realized they weren’t distancing but waiting for their orders. Now I know one has to go up to the Heat Lamp Counter to order. I got a small pork lo mien, a small shrimp fried rice, a four-piece fried catfish dinner, a pork egg roll, a shrimp egg roll, two fried chicken thighs and eyeballed the onion rings. I couldn’t wait to sample! I got to the counter and handed him my credit card and he said, “We take cash only.” Since I had three cents on me I left. On my depressingly empty-handed way home I made a pass by Rouse’s and Hobby Lobby to kill time and when it was time to go my car wouldn’t start because my key fob battery thing was dead. What am I going to do now I wondered? I can’t call Doctor out of a patient’s room to come haul me home but then I remembered Emily telling me you can use the regular key which I sampled and it worked so I decided to spend a bit more time in Hobby Lobby admiring the sea of artificial flowers then headed to my car again and unlocked the door and the alarm went off. I reminded myself of my grandmother frantically digging in her purse for Kleenex. If nothing else that day I learned people sure love to stare at the car or the person who’s causing all the ruckus. I drove home and didn’t leave the house again for a week for fear of the alarm and plus I needed gas. It seems the older I get the more confused I am about which way to put my credit card in and I don’t want to force it like I did at Wal-Mart a couple of months ago. That day I also learned people sure love to stare at the person who shuts down Self-Check-Out-Aisle #3 at Wal-Mart. I’ll get back with you on that one!

PHYLLIS BELANGER MATA was born at the old Dauterive Hospital and grew up on Wayne Street. She is a 1974 graduate of Mt. Carmel Academy and is a chili dog “without the wiener” aficionado.