Catching up with the deMahys

Published 7:00 am Wednesday, June 12, 2019

If marriage is a dance, then synchrony is key – perhaps most important when it comes time to retire.  Marilyn and Judge Paul deMahy are one of those couples who timed it so they would retire together- or at least that was the plan.

Paul became judge for the 16^th Judicial District in 1986 because he wanted to see a change in the judicial system.  In his 33-years, he has presided over thousands of juvenile, criminal, domestic, personal injury and civil cases.  A select few still stand out in his mind. 

He recalls one in particular involving a child custody dispute.  The father was seeking custody of his teenage daughter primarily because the mother and daughter were having problems. “I granted custody to the father,” Paul says “and several years later I saw the mother at a store and she thanked me for my decision saying that living apart from her daughter vastly improved their relationship.”

As a judge, Paul was reminded every week that everyone makes mistakes.  “It’s what someone does after their first offense that determines whether or not they will be a repeat offender.  Sometimes they’re in a situation they just can get out of by themselves – like in the case of drugs,” he says.

Through an Adult Drug Treatment Court he helped establish in 2002, Paul hopes to decrease the number of drug offenders.  Those who complete the program have shown a decreased return rate.

Though retired since the end of 2017, it has been a slow process for Paul to step away from the workforce altogether; he is currently working on a few cases.

While Marilyn valued her work as office administrator for the Diocese of Lafayette, in charge of the Catholic Charismatic Renewal, the disconnect was not as hard when she retired three months before Paul in 2017.

For 22 years, Marilyn oversaw an average of 20 Charismatic prayer groups weekly, held praise rallies, and coordinated a large annual conference – all while caring for five children. 

Through her work, Marilyn learned that God does not want us to stay in the same place.  The deMahy’s don’t plan to stay put. Both want to travel out of the country once a year.  Next fall, Paul and his siblings want to visit a little town in France called Orleans, where the deMahy lineage originated.  St. Petersburg is also on the travel list.  Marilyn talks about getting a small RV to visit the 14 grandchildren, some in other states.

For those couples nearing retirement, she advises, “Develop communication skills and have a prayer life together.”